Why Don't They Get It?
Dear Friends,
I just dropped my third child off at college. Which means I have spent the last month giving a lot of unsolicited advice. I felt like it was my last chance to pour all the wisdom inside my head into his. I spent a lot of energy wanting him to “get it”.
It did not work. And not because my son is an unteachable person. He isn’t. The problem was more about me than him. I wanted to give wisdom rather than helping him get wisdom.
It turns out that most forms of wisdom need to be experienced, not just explained. My frantic attempts to impart all I know fell on semi-deaf ears because of a lack of experiential knowledge. He just did not know what he did not know.
I think this applies to sharing our faith as well.
Maybe what people need to “get it” spiritually is more experiences of God, not just your knowledge. That doesn’t mean true knowledge about God isn’t important, it is. It just means there is a time and place for it.
Here are a few ways this could impact how we share our faith.
First, we should pray a lot more for God to move in their lives. Pray for God to meet them in their season of need or guilt or challenge. Pray that God touches them with His beauty and love. I recently had a discussion with someone who was genuinely not sure if they believed anymore. They were struggling spiritually. I mostly listened to their doubts and prayed for them afterwards. A few weeks later, I had a chance to help them tangibly with something. God spoke to them through my help more than anything I said. You could just feel their hearts open to God and life as they experienced real help in a place of need.
Second, we should try dialogue, not monologue. Get in conversations with people. I have a theory for why podcasts are exploding as a means of learning things. It is because during a podcast we are sitting in on a dialogue. The dialogue is more experiential. You hear the small talk, the banter, there are questions and responses. Conversation is a powerful spiritual tool. One of the most impactful spiritual moments for me this summer was sitting on a front porch having a drink with a friend. I asked him simply “What is your God story?” And we were off to the races.
What if it was more about their experience than them getting it? Try this. Talk less, pray and converse more. It just might work.
God bless,
The Donohues
